(long story) I am in the military and work with civilians-military spouse, I cant work there anymore. Advice?

(long story) I am in the military and work with civilians-military spouse, I cant work there anymore. Advice?


This is a very long story so if you dont like reading click the back button.


I am in the military and work in an office with civilians, one of them became my best friend, both of our husbands are in the military and used to work together. A soldier past away down range a couple of month ago, Originally my husband was supposed to be the CAO, wich is the person that takes care of the spouse of the deceased paperwork wise and all that stuff. Anyhow I was in school at the time and my husband could not be on that type of duty because he had the kids with him and that duty requires to be available for 24/7. So my friends husband ended up having to do it. It did not go well the thing got complicated for all source of reasons but it seem like this guy liked being away from work and not doing much, back at his regular job, he always found excuses when asked to do something else. Right from the get go he didnt like where he worked one of the reasons why is because he worked for my husband and this guy outranked my husband by promotion date. He thought it was BS but my husband is been here longer and has proven to desrved the position that he was in at the time while this other guy never showd up for work or reported to my husband when asked to do so. The whole unit is going on block leave for 2 weeks and it was put out by the commander that no one would get more days than that. of course my friend and her husband being difficult as they always are, requested 30 days to go back to the states. It got denied by my husband SGM then this civilian (my friend) when up to the brigade SGM who we happen to work for and complain about the whole team where my husbands work, she said that no one likes her husband that everyone is being unfair to him. the brigade CSM called my hubby's SGM and the civilian confronted him and called him a pice of ****, selfish and all kinds of things and he just had to take it. She also talked about the whole team even my husband and made herself and her husband look like the bigest victims. she lied to CSM and told him that the only reason why she wants to go to the states because it may be the last time her husband sees his dad. I know this is a lie she told CSM that her father in law had cancer stage 3 and would posibly die soon, I know this is a lie because she told me he was alot better and that he was going to go to California and that they would met up there. My grandma died from cancer and there is not way a terminal cancer person would travel from Colorado to California. This was one of the most horrible lies among all. After I heard all that had happened I was kind of angry at her because one she disappointed me, and two I realized that she is that type of person that would do anything and step over anyone even her friends to get what she wants. This whole situation has gotten out of control I cant work with her anymore because im tired of hearing her talking **** about my husbands team and everyone in it. She deals with the units evaluations and she finds any little thing that she can use against them and takes it to CSM because for some reason she is got him on her pocket (she also uses her looks to get what she wants). We don't talk anymore and my desk is right next to her she has made everyone life miserable, including mine even though I had nothing to do with the situation. Today was the bottom line I heard her talking once again talking about this with CSM and i got mad and my son was woth me so i got up my desk and was about to walk outside before i did something stupid CSM notice there was something wrong with me and asked ';whats wrong with you'; and i told him I just neede a break the my ex-friend said ';she just gets offended when I talk about her husband SGM'; then I left, One of my SGTs came to get me later and told me that she complained about me with my other SGT and that she told her ';she did it again, she stormed out of here with her child and disrespected CSM'; the last part was a lie I think if I would have disrespected the Command Sergeant Major he would have put me on my place. The bottom line she is got everyone on her side, everyone believes her and she wont stop. I cant work there any more. One of my SGTs is on my side but not the highest ranking one. She has put everyone she knows against my hubbys team and me. She is one of those people that is very outgoing and people are attracted to her but I know her and I know that in the inside she is an ugly mean person. one time swhe evens said that she was going to get her family to do something to my hubbys SGM because her family were criminals and that she had MY hubbys SGM address. That he didn't know who he was messing with. I dont know what to do I dont care if she gets what she want obviously things are not going to change and she is going to keep messing with peoples paperwork and stuff just because of persona(long story) I am in the military and work with civilians-military spouse, I cant work there anymore. Advice?
Advice is she is not your friend, because a true friend wouldn't do this. If everyone is believing her over you then it is a problem. Go speak to the IG about this because it isn't an issue that is just affecting you it is now affecting everyone. If you have documented proof then use it, if you have other evidence use it. If one of your SGT is on your side then make sure you talk to him/her and have them go with you to IG or be prepared to make a statement about it.(long story) I am in the military and work with civilians-military spouse, I cant work there anymore. Advice?
Have you addressed your concerns with your CoC? Not that they can do much, though. She's a civilian, so it's not like they are going to place her anywhere else. At most they will ask her to lay off, but then she may be ';catty'; and use that against you in day to day work activities.





When is your tour up? Unless you can get reassigned elsewhere, it may be that all you can really do is wait it out until it's time to ETS or PCS. In the mean time, just go there, do your job and try best to ignore her. This won't be the first time you encounter a difficult co-worker, military or civilian.
Where is the question in that? I don't think someone can tell you how to deal with a situation like that. Female drama. Sounds like you're frustrated and fed up and I sympathize, but I don't think the people around you want to be involved in the situation. I know I wouldn't want to be. Talk to people who matter and ignore her. She'll get bored eventually and move on to the next victim.
do a background check on this women, and get her threats on a recording, and go to IG and EO come on female we as women ahve these options, as a civilian empolyee you have these, you cn talk to a chaplain to chill out. I worked with women in my unit who were fuckign the 1SGT and they were getting rank and I was not. There are always 2 sides to every story, so if she is reallyu threatenignyou call the MP's to your work site.
Not sure what the question was. She is not her friend. Stay away from her and everyone is already aware of her husband because they put him in charge. Watch your own back and avoid them as much as possible.