I鈥檝e confessed to my mom and she keeps changing her mind on what I should do. Could I have some advice, if it isn鈥檛 hateful please? Should I risk it? I don鈥檛 want him to leave but I feel I owe it to him. I already did it and can鈥檛 change it. Would you leave if there was nothing more than beyond what I said?Advice for cheating on spouse-no hateful answers please?
your husband needs to hear this from you and not the friend of a friend. seriously just tell him and take the heat. your marraige can recover from this if you work on it. if you do not tell you will break from the stress believe me when I tell you this. the constant worry everyday that your secret may be coming out of the bag will destroy you physically and emotionally over time. just suck it up and tell him but be preparred to take the heat. learn from it. I am serious though the stress will ruin your body wrinkles anxiety depression.Advice for cheating on spouse-no hateful answers please?
My personal advice is keep your mouth shut. Stop telling people especially your mother. Bad move there. Let the guilt eat you alive and let your spouse live in blissful peace. If you know you are not going to do it again then don't. Never ever tell.
If my spouse cheated on me I would never want to know. Confession may be good for your soul but it will only hurt your husband. He will never trust you again. From today forward be the best wife you can be.
re: Would you leave if there was nothing more than beyond what I said?
%26gt;%26gt; I would only leave if there was no hope to ever repair the relationship in counseling or whatever is available. If you could just get back to being each other's best and most cherrished FRIEND there might be a chance to make the relationship work and maybe even get better than ever.
You must have been sort of friends in the begining so why not go back to the original LOVE?
I wouldn't tell my husband, no.
If you are having a lot of difficulty with this issue, and if it's affecting your daily life, maybe consider some therapy for a while. Perhaps that would help.
If the future brought knowledge of the affair to my husband, i'd admit it, yes.
Keep your cheating mouth shut.
Does he really deserve to have his opinion of you dragged forever into the bad. Probably, but unless you really want to hurt him for no good reason keep your mouth shut. You might end up free to pursue the other guy who wants to bang you.
BTW Keep your pants zipped.
And this is why you are not supposed to cheat on your spouse.
I would just tell him everything, if he finds out from someone else, that would be cruel.
Let him make his own decision if he wants to stay with you. Be prepared to get left.
If you are remorseful and you consider this a mistake to NOT be repeated- SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE and NEVER speak of this again. If you plan on repeating this mistake then telling him is just fair warning.....
Don't tell it and never admit it if it comes out. Deny it to you dying day. No good can come of you telling.
Tell him and risk losing him. Keep it to yourself and risk losing you. Counseling or take the gamble. It's your call.
Don't say anything. You didn't have sex, so you have time to heal the problem. Just let it go.
I am sorry for the pain you must be going through. I was in your position a while ago. I made such a horrible mistake and yes the guilt ate me alive which is what I suspect may be happening to you. I told him and we did separate. I learned a very painful lesson from my mistake and with lots of prayer I have forgiven myself and he has even forgiven me.
You must be realistic about what may happen. He may leave. He may forgive and stay. He is going to be upset but as a show of respect for him despite the mistake you made and a sincere gesture of being apologetic you should be the one to tell him. Try to envision the worse thing happening (perhaps him leaving) but remember the best thing happening (you freeing yourself of this awesome burden) Despite how others view us we do the most damage to ourselves by harboring guilt. Good Luck and I hope this helps
You did what you did and there is no changing that, but you owe it to him to tell the truth no matter how much it hurts. If he finds out in the long run or by the guy telling him, it will hurt him a lot worse. Tell him and try to work through it. If he leaves, than that is the consequence of you actions. But not telling will make you crazy, be honest to him and yourself. You messed up, but nothing should ever want to make him leave if he really loves you. You can work through anything, but it takes time and honesty. Hope this helps
If there is a chance that he could find out from someone else then you need to fess up. I had a boyfriend of 5 years cheat on me and I found out from the girl that he was cheating with. I confronted him and then he denied it. Then later he came an admitted it. I realized that was shitty on his part, if he had come and told me from the very beginning him self then I would not have been so pissed and left him. I would have been upset and angry, but I would have forgave him, because he did the same as you only sent pictures, text and made out once. Most men will get upset, but they will feel better if you told them and not from some one else and do not lie about if they ask you!
Tell him, and brace yourself for the wrath that with ensue. WTF were you thinking? Really!!
It's like having sex and accidentally getting pregnant, you know what you were getting into. You knowingly cheated on your spouse, so you better be prepared to face the consequences.
This is BS, asking a general forum if you should tell.. Own up to your disrespectful behaviors and show a little respect and tell your spouse, it's the lease you could do.
You 'owe it to him'? You may feel it is your honesty that you owe, but in reality you will clear your conscience but will leave your husband FOREVER second guessing every move you make. Your honesty will cut him like a knife and he will never be able to fully trust you again. Anytime you want to 'go out with the girls', he will think there's another guy your meeting. Any strange phone # on your cell and he will think it another guy. Do you really want to burden him with this???
Sorry, it's not that I am trying to be hateful, just totally honest on how finding out this information will totally change your relationship forever. Are you ready for that because it wont change it for the better.
seems like the only reason why you would even consider telling your husband is b/c there is a possibility of getting caught and not b/c you owe him the truth. the relationship you have with your husband is pretty much over the moment you learned to stop communicating with him and allowing yourself to be with another. now i am sure there is two sides to every story and I am sure there is something you were not getting in your relationship but you really need to think what led to this? If you are willing to work at it, then tell your husband and be willing to work, otherwise do both you and him and favor by ending the relationship so you can both find an honest and healthy relationship
I would tell him! He is your husband and be prepared for some yelling! Why would you do this other than being selfish? If so much is going on with your life, why would you spend it with a friend of a friend and not your husband? Hopefully and prayerfully he will forgive you. Put yourself in his shoes with the roles reversed. Would you want to know? How would you feel if your husband cheated on you? It takes a strong person to admit they made a mistake so I can respect that of you.
You are in a tough spot. You didn't say if your partner is single or married as you are. If he is single, he may brag about his ';conquest';. If married, he may keep quiet. If your husband is hot tempered, he will not forgive you regardless of whether he finds out or is told by you of your indiscretion. Your action will drive a wedge forever between you and your spouse. Even if he keeps you, he will never again fully trust you. I would never tell about an indiscretion and hopefully it will never come to light.
Proverbs states there is no way to quench the anger of a man whose wife has been indiscreet. Sorry I can't give you more hope or a better answer.
Well, honestly if he is going to find out it is really best that you just fess up and tell him. The worst thing he can do is find out from someone else. If you are married, you are going to lose everything in a divorce, regardless of what you did with the other person. You may as well just come out and tell him and perhaps he won't be as upset this way. But either way you look at it, it was a pretty crappy thing for you to do in the first place.
OK, so you had an emotional affair, bordering up to a physical one. Bad, very bad. You sent emails, photo's... not the brightest bulb in the box, are you?
If my hubby were to confess to something like that to me, I know things would be tough for a while, but somehow, someway we'd make it... but: If I ever found out about it some how, some way that my ever loving did that to me with someone else, FROM SOMEBODY ELSE, and I didn't hear it from him - first - he'd be GONE. No second chances, no second guessing, no long last look back. He'd be GONE. And I would thank the person telling me for having the guts and integrity to do so.
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